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Pranks

Oh, I just remembered this other time... I was on a website and I made up a prank story and posted it there.
That made me laugh.
It's not as good as the first story, but it's a keeper.

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Several years ago at my work we had one of the water dispensers that holds a 5 gallon bottle upside down that needs to be replaced periodically. On April's Fools day I took an empty bottle, filled it with water and put 50 goldfish in it. I then took one of the old caps, sealed the bottle and placed it in the dispenser. It was amazing how many people don't even look at the water bottle and simply zero in on the spigot. They'd press the lever, wait while nothing came out and then check the bottle to see if it was empty. I got some pretty good comments when people finally looked at the bottle and saw it full of goldfish.
 
I once pureed some goldfish in the blender and fed them to my 8-month-old son. You should have seen the look on his face! He never saw it coming.
 
Back when Trout lived across the street from me, he played a minor prank on me. I don't even remember what it was, but I thought I'd get revenge. My wife and I put his Tahoe for sale on KSL with an astronomical low price and a sweet description, playing it up as basically brand new. We put his cell number on it with the disclaimer: "No emails, please. Phone calls only and I'm an insomniac so the later at night, the better." Apparently it really worked because he called me and yelled at me to take it down. When I didn't, he turned his phone off and changed his voice mail message to say something to the effect of "if you're calling about the car for sale, I'm out of the country. Please call Brian at (my cell number)." The best part was, he gave the wrong number, but the number actually called a Brian, who had no clue what the hell was going on.

What ever happened to the ladder?

Anyway, how about a prank that backfired? My friend and I thought it would be funny to throw a 5 gallon bucket full of our most recent dumps/piss onto the front door of the neighborhood dick wad. After we both deposited our treasure in the bucket, I walked up to the door and prepared to launch. I was laughing so hard at the thought of doing it, that I wasn't thinking straight when I grabbed the wire handle with one hand and the bottom of the bucket with the other hand and proceeded to send the gift basket toward the door... well, the hand holding the bottom of the bucket slipped off and the momentum sent it flying forward, but my other hand was still holding the wire handle. If you can picture the physics, you'll see the humor. As it swung around, I was instantly covered in mine and my best friends turd-soup. Not a drop got on the door, but all of it ended up on my face, in my hair, and all down the front of me.

I think I was like 29 when this happened.
 
What ever happened to the ladder?

Anyway, how about a prank that backfired? My friend and I thought it would be funny to throw a 5 gallon bucket full of our most recent dumps/piss onto the front door of the neighborhood dick wad. After we both deposited our treasure in the bucket, I walked up to the door and prepared to launch. I was laughing so hard at the thought of doing it, that I wasn't thinking straight when I grabbed the wire handle with one hand and the bottom of the bucket with the other hand and proceeded to send the gift basket toward the door... well, the hand holding the bottom of the bucket slipped off and the momentum sent it flying forward, but my other hand was still holding the wire handle. If you can picture the physics, you'll see the humor. As it swung around, I was instantly covered in mine and my best friends turd-soup. Not a drop got on the door, but all of it ended up on my face, in my hair, and all down the front of me.

I think I was like 29 when this happened.

For some reason that is totally beyond my comprehension, I still have that damn ladder. But I remembered that it was after you filled my garbage can with snow, you son of a bitch.
 
For some reason that is totally beyond my comprehension, I still have that damn ladder. But I remembered that it was after you filled my garbage can with snow, you son of a bitch.

Living anywhere near Trout sounds like loads of fun.
 
My co-workers college age son played a good prank on him.

He took his Dad's cell phone and changed his contact name to "Girl I met at strip club", put the phone on vibrate and then called his Dad 5 times at 3 in the morning. He then left the cell phone open and on the kitchen table for his mother to find when she got up to make breakfast.
 
Elevator pranks

1) crack open your briefcase or handbag and say, ‘Got enough air in there?’
2) stand motionless and silent in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3) when arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors, then act embarrassed when they open.
4) greet everyone with a warm handshake then ask them to call you Admiral.
5) meow occasionally.
6) stare at another person for a while then say You’re one of THEM? then back away slowly.
7) say ‘DING!’ at every floor.
8) say ‘I wonder what these do?’ then press all the red buttons.
9) make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10) stare, grinning at another person for a while then announce ‘I don’t have any socks on.’
11) when the elevator is silent, look around then ask ‘Is that your beeper?’
12) try to make a personal phone call on an emergency phone.
13) draw a little square on the ground with chalk then announce ‘this is my personal space.’
14) when there’s only one other passenger in the elevator poke them then act like in wasn’t you.
15) push the buttons and act like they give you a shock, smile, then go back for more.
16) ask if you can push the buttons for someone else then push the wrong ones.
17) hold the doors open and say you’re waiting for a friend then after a while let the doors close and say ‘Hey Greg, how was your day?’
18) drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to pick in up then yell, ‘Hey that’s mine!’
19) bring a camera and take pictures of all the passengers.
20) pretend you’re a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with passengers.
21) Swat at flies that don’t exist.
22) Wait until there’s a huge group of people and then push the button for every floor.
 
I love elevator pranks. My kids hate riding in the elevator with me because I always do something like that.

A good one is if there is only one person in the elevator, stand shoulder to shoulder with them without saying a work. It is amazing how many people will just stand there and not say anything. It is also fun then to start a conversation with them. I am going to have to try the poke them thing.

When you get in the elevator, turn around and stand with your back to the door staring at everyone.

Ask a question of no one in particular. Just say "wow crazy weather huh" into space. Amazing how often 3 people or so will respond and then look around sheepishly.

If someone is going to a much higher floor than you (say you are getting off at 3 and they are going to 10) then as you get off the elevator really fast push every button in between and then cackle as you run off.

Ah, good times.
 
When you're in an elevator and a really fat person gets on, clear your throat while tapping the weight capacity sign.

They love that.
 
I caught a 30" carp last summer and brought it home to cut it up for catfish bait -- well, the damn thing was alive, even after being out of the water for almost an hour. I threw it in my kids' little swimming pool and he lived like a king for a few days. I got tired of him, so I transplanted him into my neighbors water feature. I damn near didn't make it back to the house I was laughing so hard. My neighbor is a mid 50's bishopric kind of guy, and his wife is a mean old sucker. (I like her a lot though) and I knew it was going to hit the fan when they found Carpy. A couple of days later he confronted me. All he said was, "I had to use a pitchfork to get him out..." It was great.
 
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