Because the unheathen world is right handed. Lefty's are on par with red heads. Anyone who disagrees can swallow a loaded pistol.
So I'll just discount another plausibly gay pick-up line, and offer free advice.
Being ambidextrous is a superior way of life altogether. And I find red heads, of the female type, do make life more philosophical. In fact, I attribute that as the reason why I have so much fun in JazzFanz. I really feel sorry for you young pups who come here because you're on the out with your wife or easychic. There's got to be a better place to go, somewhere. Old farts like me, who have mastered philosophical escape velocity, know how to say "Yes, dear. . . . " and then just wander off like they have forgotten what's next on the to-do list.
Life can be good when you really just don't care too much.
I advise that you begin conditioning your left-handed, red head wife, to accept your aging, gracefully. . . . call it "growing up", or something else with a strong positive association cloud.
