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Cowboy Poetry

PearlWatson

PearlWatson

Well-Known Member
We've got to save it!

(not to mention those 70,000 children the Republicans are trying to kill for no good reason)

The Outhouse

The service station trade was slow
The owner sat around,
With sharpened knife and cedar stick
Piled shavings on the ground.

No modern facilities had they,
The log across the rill
Led to a shack, marked His and Hers
That sat against the hill.

"Where is the ladies restroom, sir?"
The owner leaning back,
Said not a word but whittled on,
And nodded toward the shack.

With quickened step she entered there
But only stayed a minute,
Until she screamed, just like a snake
Or spider might be in it.

With startled look and beet-red face
She bounded through the door,
And headed quickly for the car
Just like three gals before.

She missed the foot log - jumped the stream
The owner gave a shout.
As her silk stockings, down at her knees
Caught on a sassafras sprout.

She tripped and fell - got up, and then
In obvious disgust,
Ran to the car, stepped on the gas,
And faded in the dust.

Of course we all desired to know
What made the gals all do
The things they did, and then we found
The whittling owner knew.

A speaking system he'd devised,
To make the thing complete,
He tied a speaker on the wall
Beneath the toilet seat.

He'd wait until the gals got set
And then the devilish tyke
Would stop his whittling long enough,
To speak into the mike.

And as she sat, a voice below
Struck terror, fright and fear,
"Will you please use the other hole,
We're painting under here!"
 
Millsapa said:
We've got to save it!

(not to mention those 70,000 children the Republicans are trying to kill for no good reason)

The Outhouse

The service station trade was slow
The owner sat around,
With sharpened knife and cedar stick
Piled shavings on the ground.

No modern facilities had they,
The log across the rill
Led to a shack, marked His and Hers
That sat against the hill.

"Where is the ladies restroom, sir?"
The owner leaning back,
Said not a word but whittled on,
And nodded toward the shack.

With quickened step she entered there
But only stayed a minute,
Until she screamed, just like a snake
Or spider might be in it.

With startled look and beet-red face
She bounded through the door,
And headed quickly for the car
Just like three gals before.

She missed the foot log - jumped the stream
The owner gave a shout.
As her silk stockings, down at her knees
Caught on a sassafras sprout.

She tripped and fell - got up, and then
In obvious disgust,
Ran to the car, stepped on the gas,
And faded in the dust.

Of course we all desired to know
What made the gals all do
The things they did, and then we found
The whittling owner knew.

A speaking system he'd devised,
To make the thing complete,
He tied a speaker on the wall
Beneath the toilet seat.

He'd wait until the gals got set
And then the devilish tyke
Would stop his whittling long enough,
To speak into the mike.

And as she sat, a voice below
Struck terror, fright and fear,
"Will you please use the other hole,
We're painting under here!"
Click to expand...

I'm not sure how you mean this humor. You tryin' to make Hairy Reed look stupid spending our tax dollars on this?

I don't think "cowboy poetry" is particularyly any better than "subway art" or those prophets doin' graffiti. But I enjoy it sometimes. I just don't want the government getting involved. Period.

BTW, here's a little story I got from a farmer:

Some city slickers from back East came to the valley and bought a neighboring farm. Might have been Ted Turner buying one of his fourteen ranches, I dunno. It was a fairly windy day, and a lot of topsoil was on it's way to Saskatchewan or somewhere. The old farmer was talkin' to his new neighbors, who asked "Does the wind always blow like this?" "Nope." answered the farmer. "Sometimes it turns around and blows the other way." City slickers looking over the fence then asked "How come there are so many rocks in your fields?" farmer said "fertilizer rocks". "I had them brought in special".

city slickers spend the whole winter sneaking over in the dead of night stealing rocks.

hey, where's my government support?
 
I think it's a crying shame that the propagandists have managed to convince anybody that the pittance the government spends on supporting the arts is the problem. Should we tax corporations? No. Should we tax the rich? Hell no. Should we end our engagement in unwinnable wars (including the war on drugs)? Absolutely not. Should we legalize marijuana? Should we regulate financial industries? No. How then can we solve the budget crisis? Let's attack the NEA.

Our country is being looted right now. It's happening right in front of your eyes.

In case you haven't figured out how this all works yet, there are three primary keys that the propagandists use to sucker in dummies like Millsapa and whoever else.

First, they get you on a grand point of philosophy. The reason you will support everything Republicans do, even though you're not well-off, and most of what they do is completely contrary to your interests, is because they've sold you on the idea of the American Dream. You're not rich, but you believe you will be rich one day. Based on this belief, you support the Republican agenda. Tax breaks for corporations. Tax benefits for the wealthy. "The rich create jobs," you are fond of saying. "I never got hired by a poor person." It follows therefore that the rich should get every break, and everybody else should pay the price. This is okay with you, in spite of the thousand reasons why it's all a lie, because you're gonna get there some day. You see yourself as one of them, even though you're one of us.

"Socialism never took root in America because the poor see themselves not as an exploited proletariat, but as temporality embarrassed millionaires."
— John Steinbeck
Click to expand...

The second way the propagandists have convinced you to believe things that are counter to your own interests is with flattery. "The people who listen to THIS show are the smartest, most well-informed in the country," they say. They feed you lines like this, and it acts upon your subconscious belief in your own superiority. "Yes," you think. "I have always noticed that I am smarter and better informed than my friends." This keeps you coming back, because you want that constant positive reinforcement.

Now that they've got you listening, the third key comes into play: Changing the subject. If the real problems of the country don't fit within the narrative of things they want you to believe, they find something to attack. I'll give you an example.

I was listening to the Glenn Beck a few weeks ago, and the replacement host (Beck was sick or something) began to talk about the budget crisis. And he turned his attention to the serious and important topic of cowboy poetry. "Cowboy poetry," he said. "Do we need this? Why does the government fund poetry. It's just entertainment. Isn't that a little bit like government funded pornography? Government funded professional wrestling? Government funded monster truck rallies?" He went on like this for a good 15 or 20 minutes, spending most of the air time on the fantastical, made-up, imaginary notion of government-funded pornography. Boy, he really got the blood of his callers boiling.

If a person were listening to this program without their guard up, they might have come away with the impression that it was just as despicable for the government to spend money on supporting the arts as it would be for the government to spend money producing pornography. Morally, there would be no difference.

Then a lot of callers called up, outraged that the government would waste money on the arts, instead of fixing the budget crisis.

Subtly, the host posed it as an either-or equation. Kill the NEA and fix the budget crisis, or continue to support cowboy poetry and bankrupt the country. He didn't use those words, because then the listeners might have realized that his whole position was completely idiotic.

Did the host ever mention any realistic solutions? No.

Didn't he mention how much we have spent on the wars? No.

Didn't he mention how two-thirds of American corporations pay no taxes? No.

Didn't he mention that the rich pay a much smaller percentage of taxes than they did in our country's most prosperous times?

Didn't he mention that corporate executives make hundreds of times more, on average, than the employees who work for the companies -- as opposed to about ten times more during our country's most prosperous times?

Did he mention how many people we have in prison and what it costs to keep them there?

Did he mention the unwinnable war on drugs?

Did he mention black budgets?

Did he mention that if we: made corporations pay taxes, returned taxes on the wealthy to half of their previous rates, and ended the wars in the Middle East, that there would be no budget crisis?

No? Why ever not? Well, because those realistic, tangible solutions to our country's problems do not fit within the narrative that the propagandists want to propagate. They don't want to talk about the real issues. So they find something that sounds silly, even though it's not, and they make you believe it's an issue.

Isn't it rotten that government money supports the NEA?

Isn't it terrible that government money supports NPR?

Meanwhile, the country is being ****ing looted, and what you care about is cowboy poetry.

**** you.
 
babe said:
Let's just agree to not spend any of all that, and shutter the government and let the people go free. babe
Click to expand...

Not yet. I'm not ready. Give me a few years to get my food storage together.
 
UB said:
This is a sphincter of the internet.
Click to expand...

True as that may be, well, sometimes it's fun to play with sphincters. . . . .lol. . . . but seriously there is little in life that can beat a good crap in due season.

Harry Reid is nothing if he is not about payoffs to his state. I'd settle for just retiring him, maybe. . . . but Nevada is pretty hopeless. The big boys will always be finding someone to be their "made man".
 
Now that we are united to save da poetry...except Gameface who doesn't know the value of cowboys expressing themselves...we can move on to visualizing the size of the proposed budget cuts:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cWt8hTayupE
 
come on, how can you vote against the fine poetic lyricism of Roger Miller?

DANG ME
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hlVwPUigPGk

DO WACKA DO
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UI-Y0CMGwxo

CHUG A LUG
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KsNWlM3fWmI

and last but not least...
KING OF THE ROAD
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9GOkc6aEfkM
 
moevillini said:
come on, how can you vote against the fine poetic lyricism of Roger Miller?

DANG ME
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hlVwPUigPGk

DO WACKA DO
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UI-Y0CMGwxo

CHUG A LUG
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KsNWlM3fWmI

and last but not least...
KING OF THE ROAD
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9GOkc6aEfkM
Click to expand...


You would have to do that. You found my never-before-admitted most influential personal guide. And put it right out in no uncertain terms.

But Roger Miller made his own way without government support. Paid more taxes than I have earned in a lifetime, too.

If those cowboys only got a good manager I bet they could pay more taxes than Harry Reid can spend. . . . uh, well, maybe not that much. . . . . but more than Harry Reid is willing to give them from your payroll deductions.
 
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