Jimmer's Stock Through the Roof...

[High Plains Drifter]

...after the SI Cover photo. He's a national darling. Grown men are ga ga over the Jimmer.

Thoughts?

 

[VINYLONE]

He'll be another stiff in the NBA.

 

[High Plains Drifter]

This photo is evidence he's superhuman...

 

[dantheman]

If he ends up a lottery pick, then good for him, I like Jimmer. Having said that, I think his draft stock can only go down from here.

 

[LogGrad98]

Look it is obvious from that picture that he has the highest vertical jump ever recorded in the NBA, and that was on a simple jump shot. What was that, 8 feet or something? I imagine if he really went at the hoop he would fly right over it, backboard and all. He could jump over an airplane in flight during the dunk contest, not some tiny little car. I mean now it is obvious that he is the number one pick in the draft hands-down. In fact I heard he will be the number one pick for the next 3 drafts because everyone knows every #1 pick after him will still be second best. They will all just start at #2. Also they tried to vote him into the NBA hall of fame this year and he missed it by one vote, and that guy marked the wrong box by accident and tried to hang himself when he realized what he had done. And I also heard that every team in the NBA will be spotted 50 pts when they play against Jimmer's team just so they don't all get blown out by 70 or 80. And that picture on SI? It is going to be the new logo for the NBA. Pro Football and Baseball are protesting though because they realize that as soon as they NBA makes that change, no one will watch football or baseball again. 3 baseball teams already filed for bankruptcy preemptively. And 18 teams in the NBA have petitioned Stern to allow them to have 7 players on the court when they face Jimmer's team just to ensure they can guard him well enough that he doesn't score 100 pts every single game. The other 12 teams want the fouls limit raised to 18 for guards before they foul out. Stern is thinking about it. Another rule change he is considering is requiring Jimmer to wear a ball and chain to slow him down just enough that he can barely dunk and can only outrun 98% of the NBA. And Stern recently announced that he has changed the lottery to include all 30 teams so he can continue the NBA conspiracy to get the biggest markets the best teams and rig the lottery so New York gets the first pick this year, using a bent ping-pong ball.

 

[Jazz Spazz]

TL-DNR
It's obvious you are just another stiff poster (like a few others), and are just chucking posts up on this board.
We need more efficiency, not so much volume.
We need to see your Rep Per Post stats to be sure, but our Jazzfanz team needs more defense, and team play.... and less selfish, blackhole posters.

TIA

 

[LogGrad98]

Tl-dnr


Ok to be real, if my post had been in defense of Jimmer you would have been all over it for it's awesomeness. But you are blinded by your biases and unable to entertain any idea that does not fit your paradigm so your narrow view limits your ability to perceive true awesomeness in all it's varied forms.

 

[Jazz Spazz]

Tl-dnr


Ok to be real, if my post had been in defense of Jimmer you would have been all over it for it's awesomeness. But you are blinded by your biases and unable to entertain any idea that does not fit your paradigm so your narrow view limits your ability to perceive true awesomeness in all it's varied forms.

I actually already know your viewpoint on The Jimmer.
I really did not read it this time because it was too long.
Then, I tried to have a little fun with you.
I actually would have preferred my little joke to be about Vinyl because of his huge post count.... and the fact that you have the most rep on the board might mean you are one of the better Rep Per Post posters......but I took the opportunity.
I also would not have worshipped you if you posted great things about Jimmer.
I usually play my argument up a notch or two to offset the disdain for him you and others have.

I like Jimmer and think he will do fine, I also agree that most likely he will be a backup of some sort in the NBA.... with a slim chance he will be a starter or borderline all-star if everything works out perfectly for him. I just try to "balance the boat" so the haters don't tip the boat over.

By the way, I like you as a poster for the most part... and I also think anyone who tells someone else they are "blinded by your biases and unable to entertain any idea that does not fit your paradigm so your narrow view limits your ability to perceive true awesomeness in all it's varied forms" is the person that is "blinded by your biases and unable to entertain any idea that does not fit your paradigm so your narrow view limits your ability to perceive true awesomeness in all it's varied forms". In looking for the mote in my eye, you seem to be looking around your own beam.

I am trying to think of some more material that will make this post even longer, in hopes that you and others will decide it is too long, and will decide not to read it. I think I have suceeded in my goal. Carry on with the jokes, and Jimmer hate, and funness and all of that. We all love you and think you are the bestest poster on the board.

Heart - JazzSpazz

 

[franklin]

This thread is awesomeness glowing. Thanks to this thread, scientists just made an incredible breakthrough that will change the Jimmerverse forever. Awesomeness is now measurable coming from this thread and is being given off faster than the speed of light. It's so incredibly fast, and though measurable, still incomprehensible by the human brain. Top notch geneticists are working around the clock to fuse dolphin, human, and the magnetic compass part of migratory bird brains into a giant ball of goo in hopes of creating a brain intelligent enough to understand the implications of measured awesome. Though too early to tell, experimental physicists are leaning heavily toward the notion that this thread's awesomeness will trump The Donald's, The Jimmer's, The Dos Equis Guy's, The Obama's, and Brad Pitt's awesomeness--all still unmeasurable combined--in one fell swoop. The theoretical physics universe is abuzz with speculation that awesomeness can be captured and transformed into the birth of real life Sheldon Cooper, Gregory House, Fox Moulder, Gil Grisson, Captain Picard's mentor, and especially that ****ed up redheaded character on CSI. They also believe it may become the rebirth of DaVinci, Einstein, and Galileo, but not quite enough to bring back the Captain Moroni-Thomas Jefferson-George Washington mix speculated to lead the constitutional restoration march. Scientists believe an elixir with that much power would require the restoration of and single best one word awesomeness contribution from The Hopper.

Pro Football and Baseball are protesting though because they realize that as soon as they NBA makes that change, no one will watch football or baseball again. 3 baseball teams already filed for bankruptcy preemptively.

Nuh uh, dude. Tim Tebow.

John 3:16: "For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish but have everlasting life."
ohn 16:33: "These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world."
Ephesians 2:8-10 "For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.”

Who can stop those eyes? It's obvious The Tebow is the anti-Christ. Who can stop Tim Tebow?

I actually already know your viewpoint on The Jimmer.
I really did not read it this time because it was too long.
Then, I tried to have a little fun with you.
I actually would have preferred my little joke to be about Vinyl because of his huge post count.... and the fact that you have the most rep on the board might mean you are one of the better Rep Per Post posters......but I took the opportunity.
I also would not have worshipped you if you posted great things about Jimmer.
I usually play my argument up a notch or two to offset the disdain for him you and others have.

I like Jimmer and think he will do fine, I also agree that most likely he will be a backup of some sort in the NBA.... with a slim chance he will be a starter or borderline all-star if everything works out perfectly for him. I just try to "balance the boat" so the haters don't tip the boat over.

By the way, I like you as a poster for the most part... and I also think anyone who tells someone else they are "blinded by your biases and unable to entertain any idea that does not fit your paradigm so your narrow view limits your ability to perceive true awesomeness in all it's varied forms" is the person that is "blinded by your biases and unable to entertain any idea that does not fit your paradigm so your narrow view limits your ability to perceive true awesomeness in all it's varied forms". In looking for the mote in my eye, you seem to be looking around your own beam.

I am trying to think of some more material that will make this post even longer, in hopes that you and others will decide it is too long, and will decide not to read it. I think I have suceeded in my goal. Carry on with the jokes, and Jimmer hate, and funness and all of that. We all love you and think you are the bestest poster on the board.

Heart - JazzSpazz

Are you trying to cop --Love, Franklin.? Although it increases the awesomeness outpouring on the level of 100, you're still doing it wrong. Poser. And please take down the apologetic part of this. It was a near epic post but I'm so sorry is tender, not cool.

My post is the longest now. Go shave, children.

 

[LogGrad98]

(1) I actually already know your viewpoint on The Jimmer.

(2) Then, I tried to have a little fun with you....I usually play my argument up a notch or two to offset the disdain for him you and others have.

(3) I like Jimmer and think he will do fine, I also agree that most likely he will be a backup of some sort in the NBA.... with a slim chance he will be a starter or borderline all-star if everything works out perfectly for him. I just try to "balance the boat" so the haters don't tip the boat over.

(4) By the way, I like you as a poster for the most part... and I also think anyone who tells someone else they are "blinded by your biases and unable to entertain any idea that does not fit your paradigm so your narrow view limits your ability to perceive true awesomeness in all it's varied forms" is the person that is "blinded by your biases and unable to entertain any idea that does not fit your paradigm so your narrow view limits your ability to perceive true awesomeness in all it's varied forms". In looking for the mote in my eye, you seem to be looking around your own beam.

(5) I am trying to think of some more material that will make this post even longer

(6) Heart - JazzSpazz

I am not good at breaking up quotes so I entered numbers.

(1) Actually your response shows you don't know my opinion on the Jimmer. It's ok I have kind of purposely been somewhat vague. Makes it more fun.

(2) See (1) above. I play mine a notch or 6 in the other direction to offset the intense love many have shown for the Jimmer. Think hyperbole. I enjoy the highly hyperbolic statement over the blatantly sarcastic. It is a million billion times better.

(3) We agree here for the most part. If you have read any of my serious posts you would see that I have largely expressed this idea. He obviosuly has his limitations, and I compare him to Reddick, but I happen to think Reddick is entirely serviceable, and it wouldn't be bad for Jimmer to be that kind of player.

(4) I like you very much as a poster, and wasn't really directing anything at you, rather continuing on (2) above. And I see that you are catching on. I was poking fun at myself more than anything else. See (2) above again regarding hyperbole. The bolded sentence there is the kicker, blatantly over-the-top reference to "awesomeness in all its forms". Franky got it too and carried it on if you notice.

(5) That was the point of my first post.

(6) Ditto.

 

[LogGrad98]

Who can stop Tim Tebow?

Your Sloanfield impersonation needs work.






Oh yeah and

You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to franklin again.

 

[Jazz Spazz]

TL-DNR
It's obvious you are just another stiff poster (like a few others), and are just chucking posts up on this board.
We need more efficiency, not so much volume.
We need to see your Rep Per Post stats to be sure, but our Jazzfanz team needs more defense, and team play.... and less selfish, blackhole posters.

TIA

Tl-dnr


Ok to be real, if my post had been in defense of Jimmer you would have been all over it for it's awesomeness. But you are blinded by your biases and unable to entertain any idea that does not fit your paradigm so your narrow view limits your ability to perceive true awesomeness in all it's varied forms.

I actually already know your viewpoint on The Jimmer.
I really did not read it this time because it was too long.
Then, I tried to have a little fun with you.
I actually would have preferred my little joke to be about Vinyl because of his huge post count.... and the fact that you have the most rep on the board might mean you are one of the better Rep Per Post posters......but I took the opportunity.
I also would not have worshipped you if you posted great things about Jimmer.
I usually play my argument up a notch or two to offset the disdain for him you and others have.

I like Jimmer and think he will do fine, I also agree that most likely he will be a backup of some sort in the NBA.... with a slim chance he will be a starter or borderline all-star if everything works out perfectly for him. I just try to "balance the boat" so the haters don't tip the boat over.

By the way, I like you as a poster for the most part... and I also think anyone who tells someone else they are "blinded by your biases and unable to entertain any idea that does not fit your paradigm so your narrow view limits your ability to perceive true awesomeness in all it's varied forms" is the person that is "blinded by your biases and unable to entertain any idea that does not fit your paradigm so your narrow view limits your ability to perceive true awesomeness in all it's varied forms". In looking for the mote in my eye, you seem to be looking around your own beam.

I am trying to think of some more material that will make this post even longer, in hopes that you and others will decide it is too long, and will decide not to read it. I think I have suceeded in my goal. Carry on with the jokes, and Jimmer hate, and funness and all of that. We all love you and think you are the bestest poster on the board.

Heart - JazzSpazz

This thread is awesomeness glowing. Thanks to this thread, scientists just made an incredible breakthrough that will change the Jimmerverse forever. Awesomeness is now measurable coming from this thread and is being given off faster than the speed of light. It's so incredibly fast, and though measurable, still incomprehensible by the human brain. Top notch geneticists are working around the clock to fuse dolphin, human, and the magnetic compass part of migratory bird brains into a giant ball of goo in hopes of creating a brain intelligent enough to understand the implications of measured awesome. Though too early to tell, experimental physicists are leaning heavily toward the notion that this thread's awesomeness will trump The Donald's, The Jimmer's, The Dos Equis Guy's, The Obama's, and Brad Pitt's awesomeness--all still unmeasurable combined--in one fell swoop. The theoretical physics universe is abuzz with speculation that awesomeness can be captured and transformed into the birth of real life Sheldon Cooper, Gregory House, Fox Moulder, Gil Grisson, Captain Picard's mentor, and especially that ****ed up redheaded character on CSI. They also believe it may become the rebirth of DaVinci, Einstein, and Galileo, but not quite enough to bring back the Captain Moroni-Thomas Jefferson-George Washington mix speculated to lead the constitutional restoration march. Scientists believe an elixir with that much power would require the restoration of and single best one word awesomeness contribution from The Hopper.



Nuh uh, dude. Tim Tebow.

John 3:16: "For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish but have everlasting life."
ohn 16:33: "These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world."
Ephesians 2:8-10 "For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.”

Who can stop those eyes? It's obvious The Tebow is the anti-Christ. Who can stop Tim Tebow?



Are you trying to cop --Love, Franklin.? Although it increases the awesomeness outpouring on the level of 100, you're still doing it wrong. Poser. And please take down the apologetic part of this. It was a near epic post but I'm so sorry is tender, not cool.

My post is the longest now. Go shave, children.

I am not good at breaking up quotes so I entered numbers.

(1) Actually your response shows you don't know my opinion on the Jimmer. It's ok I have kind of purposely been somewhat vague. Makes it more fun.

(2) See (1) above. I play mine a notch or 6 in the other direction to offset the intense love many have shown for the Jimmer. Think hyperbole. I enjoy the highly hyperbolic statement over the blatantly sarcastic. It is a million billion times better.

(3) We agree here for the most part. If you have read any of my serious posts you would see that I have largely expressed this idea. He obviosuly has his limitations, and I compare him to Reddick, but I happen to think Reddick is entirely serviceable, and it wouldn't be bad for Jimmer to be that kind of player.

(4) I like you very much as a poster, and wasn't really directing anything at you, rather continuing on (2) above. And I see that you are catching on. I was poking fun at myself more than anything else. See (2) above again regarding hyperbole. The bolded sentence there is the kicker, blatantly over-the-top reference to "awesomeness in all its forms". Franky got it too and carried it on if you notice.

(5) That was the point of my first post.

(6) Ditto.

Your Sloanfield impersonation needs work.






Oh yeah and

LogGrad, after finally reading your original post... it is pretty darn hilarious.
Franklin - I win, my post just Tim Tebowed your post..... I'm pretty sure the mods will close this thread now after this win.

I also learned a valuable lesson just now, there is a limit to the multi-quote function.... it did not take them all.

I just learned via twitter that the NFL, NHL, MLS, and MLB are all voting Jimmer their regular season MVP's to counter him being in the NBA, and all All-Star games will either be held in Glens Falls, or Provo. This is good news.

Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth, upon this continent, a new nation, conceived in Liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal.
Now we are engaged in a great civil war, testing whether that nation, or any nation so conceived, and so dedicated, can long endure. We are met here on a great battlefield of that war. We have come to dedicate a portion of it as a final resting place for those who here gave their lives that that nation might live. It is altogether fitting and proper that we should do this.

But in a larger sense we can not dedicate - we can not consecrate - we can not hallow this ground. The brave men, living and dead, who struggled, here, have consecrated it far above our poor power to add or detract. The world will little note, nor long remember, what we say here, but can never forget what they did here.

It is for us, the living, rather to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they have, thus far, so nobly carried on. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us - that from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they here gave the last full measure of devotion - that we here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain; that this nation shall have a new birth of freedom; and that this government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.

^^ just because

 

[franklin]

(4) I like you very much as a poster, and wasn't really directing anything at you, rather continuing on (2) above. And I see that you are catching on. I was poking fun at myself more than anything else. See (2) above again regarding hyperbole. The bolded sentence there is the kicker, blatantly over-the-top reference to "awesomeness in all its forms". Franky got it too and carried it on if you notice.

You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to LogGrad98 again.

^^ just because

You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to JazzSpazz again.

You're both ruining your own masterpieces. Just want you to know.

Expect SnitchDale stalking.

 

[LogGrad98]

This is my favorite thread.

 

[TheDude]

I hope that Jimmer can be a Reddick like player in the NBA. I don't think he is going to have a much higher ceiling than that.