Stupid Pet Peeves

[franklin]

I get so tired of that complaint... Here's the deal; you wanted to be a stay at home mom, I reluctantly agreed, have been super supportive, and haven't bitched about damn near anything. But seriously, I'm getting tired of having to come home and cook dinner. I'm tired of moving piles of laundry off of the bed. I'm tired of having to be the one who finally has to give the toilets in the house haircuts. I'm tired of the DVR being 98% full of Real Housewives, the latest "I'm a whore, I'll find my soulmate thru Reality TV!", and any/all of the sixty or so shows from The CW. But like I said, I rarely say a damn thing, because it's just not worth it, and deep down, I really don't care most of the time. HOWEVER, on the rare occasion that I do bring something up, I inevitably get the "I don't have any adults to talk to" or the "I don't have any friends down here" or my favorite, "I've been busy doing laundry ALL DAY!" types of excuses, usually followed by the "I don't have anyone to talk to all day" nonsense. Is it really all that hard to keep up on our little house, laundry, etc so you can have time to go do something?

My family was out of town for ten days recently and on the 9th day -- about the time the smell from the sink became unbearable -- I decided I better clean the house. I actually wanted to test a few things, so I threw a load of laundry in and started cleaning. My house was cleaned top to bottom, entire house vacuumed and dusted, kids **** all put away, garbages taken out, and 75% of my laundry done, folded, and hung up in just over two hours. She actually asked me if I had had the maids come. Boo ya.

tl;dr

I'm sick of the excuses and whining about how long and hard it is to do laundry and keep the house clean, and especially about not having friends to talk to or do stuff with. My inlaws read JF on occasion, and it has come back to bite me a time or two, but imma gon' take my chances on this one. The Trout is fed up.

This. All of it.
For some reason, I'm able to take care of the kids and get **** done, but she can't. I must be Superman. And I'm getting really sick of eating things like quesadillas, corn dogs, or Mac & cheese for dinner every night. Once in a while I can deal with, but not 5 nights a week.

Don't get me started... My house looks like a tornado came through 6/7ths the time. I work 13.5 hour days and have to clear a path every night to get to the couch, and then usually have to clean it off and find the cushions to put back on. I don't leave the damn thing that way on Mondays when I have the kids and she works (that's the 7th, clean day).

My wife isn't lazy by any means and does all those other things us guys don't notice like grocery shopping, doctors appointments, etc. She also insists on cooking a full dinner every night and expects me to eat at 7:30-8:00 when I don't want to (but does it ever get cleaned up afterward?). She also has an infant that keeps her up half the night so mornings are rough to say the least. WTS, I cannot understand why she cannot do the little things that adults are expected to do and also makes the work load so much easier like throwing her effin socks in the laundry instead of by the door, picking up her lunch plate off the floor and rinsing it off while the food isn't hardened on, making the kids eat at the table, making the kids put their pajamas in the laundry or doing it for them while she's getting them dressed, taking a damn diaper out to the trash, putting her purse, diaper bag, pump bag, and work bag on the hanger right by the door where it goes instead of strewn across the floor EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.


Oh and BTW Trout, she is astonished at how much faster I clean than her. 20-30 minutes a day is the difference between a disaster and a half presentable pad.

 

[franklin]

Once in a while I can deal with, but not 5 nights a week.

Go buy a crockpot, meat, barbecue sauce, and some gravy packets if you don't like drippings gravy or are too dumb to figure out how to add flour or cornstarch and water. Cook the roast on Sunday and throw it in the fridge. BBQ chicken, pulled pork, and roast beef and potatoes and carrots for at least a couple days with basically no work involved.

Better yet, have your wife look up the Costa Vida sweet pulled pork recipe. She'll be so proud of herself that she'll start making it more often to show off. You can pretend to not know it takes little effort and praise her for how hard she must have worked to make you a gourmet meal for a fifth the cost of going to the restaurant.

We also like to make double portions of enchiladas and the like that can freeze in the pan. It's zero extra work but saves you cooking one night when things get busy or you just don't feel like doing it or cannot come up with an idea (I'm sure I'm preaching to the choir but that's a big issue for women who have to do it every day).

 

[fishonjazz]

Hmm. My wife complains about none of this. Is she perfect at it? No, but she has had, up to a month ago, 3 or 4 kids at home and all of their activities, and I never expected her to be perfect at it, not that you expect perfection, I get what you are saying about at least get SOMETHING done, but it never bothered me to come home to some laundry waiting to be done because I knew she would beat herself up over not being perfect at it way more than I ever would.

Instead I focused my efforts on the kids and their inability to help their mom unless I was breathing down their necks. Chore charts, reward systems, punishment systems, etc etc. What works this week won't work next week, and so on. And things get better, then they get worse again, then they are complaining that they cleaned 2 more dishes than their sister did the last time she had the kitchen so they shouldn't have to do anything. Ugh. It's like herding cats, or being pecked to death by a duck.

It made it that much sweeter the last time we were visiting our son who is now on his own and shacking up with a chick that barely does anything around the house, and he got emotional and said how much he appreciated everything mom did for him when he lived with us, and everything we tried to teach him about being part of the family and helping to take care of things, and that he was sorry for all the times he acted like a bitch to me or his mother when all we asked for was some help. I mean you hope on some level they "get it", right? I guess sometimes they do.

But I got so lucky with the wife I have. She takes care of me and the family and never complains about it and always apologizes when I get home from work and the house isn't perfect, even though I never say anything about stuff that didn't get done and only thank her for the work she does, because, as she says, since I work a lot of hours to provide for the family I deserve to come home to a clean home and a warm meal. And because, in the end, I don't want to do any of that ****. So our system works, for us.

Hey log, gtfo with this type of post.

That is not how this thread works bub

 

[moevillini]

yesterday I saw a guy actually pushing a lawn mower. it warmed my heart.

for those who don't know what a "segway" mower is, here are some pictures

and then again...

this one's a hoot!

by the way, I hope all you men complaining about your wives don't expect her to cut the grass.

that's a man's job!!!!

LOL :wink:

 

[LogGrad98]

Hey log, gtfo with this type of post.

That is not how this thread works bub

I had my peeve in the middle of it, getting pecked to death by a duck. Reading comprehension ftw.

edit: I think I was supposed to add something about you wanting peanut butter with that jelly, but I am not "hipster" enough to pull that off. tbh

 

[LogGrad98]

yesterday I saw a guy actually pushing a lawn mower. it warmed my heart.

for those who don't know what a "segway" mower is, here are some pictures

and then again...

this one's a hoot!

by the way, I hope all you men complaining about your wives don't expect her to cut the grass.

that's a man's job!!!!

LOL :wink:

That is decidedly a woman's job. I HATE yard work, on par with Justin Bieber and ainthopper's posting style. And my wife loves it. Hence it is women's work.

 

[franklin]

by the way, I hope all you men complaining about your wives don't expect her to cut the grass.

that's a man's job!!!!

LOL :wink:

I only mow the lawn about once in 5-6 weeks. That way my wife gets sick of looking at it and does it herself.

 

[bigb]

Hmm. My wife complains about none of this. Is she perfect at it? No, but she has had, up to a month ago, 3 or 4 kids at home and all of their activities, and I never expected her to be perfect at it, not that you expect perfection, I get what you are saying about at least get SOMETHING done, but it never bothered me to come home to some laundry waiting to be done because I knew she would beat herself up over not being perfect at it way more than I ever would.

Instead I focused my efforts on the kids and their inability to help their mom unless I was breathing down their necks. Chore charts, reward systems, punishment systems, etc etc. What works this week won't work next week, and so on. And things get better, then they get worse again, then they are complaining that they cleaned 2 more dishes than their sister did the last time she had the kitchen so they shouldn't have to do anything. Ugh. It's like herding cats, or being pecked to death by a duck.

It made it that much sweeter the last time we were visiting our son who is now on his own and shacking up with a chick that barely does anything around the house, and he got emotional and said how much he appreciated everything mom did for him when he lived with us, and everything we tried to teach him about being part of the family and helping to take care of things, and that he was sorry for all the times he acted like a bitch to me or his mother when all we asked for was some help. I mean you hope on some level they "get it", right? I guess sometimes they do.

But I got so lucky with the wife I have. She takes care of me and the family and never complains about it and always apologizes when I get home from work and the house isn't perfect, even though I never say anything about stuff that didn't get done and only thank her for the work she does, because, as she says, since I work a lot of hours to provide for the family I deserve to come home to a clean home and a warm meal. And because, in the end, I don't want to do any of that ****. So our system works, for us.

I certainly don't expect to come home to a spotless home. But a little effort would be nice. About once every other week she'll clean the kitchen, and then not do anything else because the kitchen was "too hard". I'll praise her for it, but if you ask her, she cleaned the entire kitchen at a restaurant that serves 1000 people every day.
The sad part is, I can guarantee that she spends a minimum of 6 hours a day on Facebook, watching tv, or her other social media sites.

 

[bigb]

Go buy a crockpot, meat, barbecue sauce, and some gravy packets if you don't like drippings gravy or are too dumb to figure out how to add flour or cornstarch and water. Cook the roast on Sunday and throw it in the fridge. BBQ chicken, pulled pork, and roast beef and potatoes and carrots for at least a couple days with basically no work involved.

Better yet, have your wife look up the Costa Vida sweet pulled pork recipe. She'll be so proud of herself that she'll start making it more often to show off. You can pretend to not know it takes little effort and praise her for how hard she must have worked to make you a gourmet meal for a fifth the cost of going to the restaurant.

We also like to make double portions of enchiladas and the like that can freeze in the pan. It's zero extra work but saves you cooking one night when things get busy or you just don't feel like doing it or cannot come up with an idea (I'm sure I'm preaching to the choir but that's a big issue for women who have to do it every day).

We have multiple crock pots and a **** ton of meats. She just doesn't take the ten minutes it requires to get it together. I've literally been working 7 days a week for a couple months, so I'm not doing it.

 

[bigb]

by the way, I hope all you men complaining about your wives don't expect her to cut the grass.

that's a man's job!!!!

LOL :wink:

My wife literally doesn't know how to start the lawnmower. I do that on top of working 7 days a week, doing the dishes, and the laundry. My wife is a stay at home mom.



But I know I shouldn't complain too much. She's a wonderful mother to the kids. She just didn't grow up having to do anything in a household just like she's in now. Her mom didn't clean or cook very often, so that's what she knows.

 

[seattlejazzfan]

IMO, family members of posters, especially spouses, should be off limits in terms of insults, etc, but damn, bigB, sounds like you are a ****ty judge of "talent". I hope she is smoking hot.

Sent from my SGH-T959V using Tapatalk 2

 

[bigb]

IMO, family members of posters, especially spouses, should be off limits in terms of insults, etc, but damn, bigB, sounds like you are a ****ty judge of "talent". I hope she is smoking hot.

Sent from my SGH-T959V using Tapatalk 2

All of my bitching is more the result of my current mood than anything she does/doesn't do. Overall, I'm very happy with her and our relationship. I just kind of occasionally let things build until I have to vent.




And yes, she is unbelievably smoking hot. I definitely married WAAAAAY up.

 

[franklin]

I've literally been working 7 days a week for a couple months, so I'm not doing it.

I do that on top of working 7 days a week, doing the dishes, and the laundry.

Damn dude, that's rough. I don't work anywhere near as much, have half the kids and don't have any church obligations. Guess I should quit feeling sorry for myself right about now.

 

[bigb]

Damn dude, that's rough. I don't work anywhere near as much, have half the kids and don't have any church obligations. Guess I should quit feeling sorry for myself right about now.

*****
Edit: think "cat" to get the filtered word

 

[QuinSnydersHair]

My wife literally doesn't know how to start the lawnmower. I do that on top of working 7 days a week, doing the dishes, and the laundry. My wife is a stay at home mom.



But I know I shouldn't complain too much. She's a wonderful mother to the kids. She just didn't grow up having to do anything in a household just like she's in now. Her mom didn't clean or cook very often, so that's what she knows.

I'm not trolling or trying to instigate when I say from the little I've read in the last 20 seconds or so that it sounds like you enable her. Am I wrong?

Having said that, is there anything she gives a **** about that if you didn't do it, she'd hem and haw, and you could use that as leverage?

I ask because your wife sounds (a bit) how MsSerp used to be. Only MsSerp has always worked. But my point is, MsSerp's cleaning (amongst other things), or lack thereof, was God awful. But I would bring it up all time, being as frank as one could possibly be, about the fact that I wouldn't tolerate such and **** had to change. Period. And it has.

 

[bigb]

I'm not trolling or trying to instigate when I say from the little I've read in the last 20 seconds or so that it sounds like you enable her. Am I wrong?

Having said that, is there anything she gives a **** about that if you didn't do it, she'd hem and haw, and you could use that as leverage?

I ask because your wife sounds (a bit) how MsSerp used to be. Only MsSerp has always worked. But my point is, MsSerp's cleaning (amongst other things), or lack thereof, was God awful. But I would bring it up all time, being as frank as one could possibly be, about the fact that I wouldn't tolerate such and **** had to change. Period. And it has.

Oh, I totally enable her. Well aware of that fact. Me doing it is easier than the headache.
And in all fairness, now that the kids are back in school, she has gotten better.

 

[QuinSnydersHair]

Oh, I totally enable her. Well aware of that fact. Me doing it is easier than the headache.
And in all fairness, now that the kids are back in school, she has gotten better.

I hear ya. No judging bro. I just have no patience for ******** like that.

 

[franklin]

I hear ya. No judging bro. I just have no patience for ******** like that.

No offense bro but you don't know what it's like having kids.

My wife was a clean freak before having two, then it all flipped complete opposite. It was hard not to enable her. She was always a very hard working, career oriented person but also grew up with the house wife expectations ingrained, as was mine. That's what we had expected as a life together at 19, 20, 21, but it turned out that being home tending kids all day isn't exactly the ideal life for every woman. Not tolerating "patience for ******** like that" is not an option at that point in life. Talking to four walls all day (and night) isn't very fun.

 

[QuinSnydersHair]

No offense bro but you don't know what it's like having kids.

My wife was a clean freak before having two, then it all flipped complete opposite. It was hard not to enable her. She was always a very hard working, career oriented person but also grew up with the house wife expectations ingrained, as was mine. That's what we had expected as a life together at 19, 20, 21, but it turned out that being home tending kids all day isn't exactly the ideal life for every woman. Not tolerating "patience for ******** like that" is not an option at that point in life. Talking to four walls all day (and night) isn't very fun.

I'll respectfully disagree. I do have a kid (only two months old) but I'll brush that aside as she's so young and so you're right, I don't have a full appreciation for the time and energy it will take to tend to and raise multiple children once they're a bit older.

That said, I find people, in general, to make excuses for why **** doesn't get done. Listen, I don't need a 100% clean house all the time. I wasn't saying that. In my particular case that I think alluded to, I would clean the whole house and 30 minutes later, MsSerp would leave crumbs all over the countertops. They'd still be there the next day, the next night. They take five seconds to wipe off into the trash. It's ****ed up. Sorry but it is. If someone is going to put forth all the energy to clean the whole house, have some respect for it. **** like that, basic disrespect or common courtesy is one thing I was mentioning that would bother me. There needs to be at least semi-equitable effort in the relationship imo.

 

[QuinSnydersHair]

And I know because like bigb, I do all the **** around the house. I have hired somebody for the lawn (I suck at edging) because I want it to look perfect but beyond that I clean all our hardwoods (2,800 square feet of them), dust the house, Windex the windows, clean the kitchen, take out the trash, empty our basement's dehumidifiers multiple times a day, do the laundry (MsSerp does do this about 30% of the time), get the groceries (she does this about 30% of the time too), do all the odd jobs, maintain a job as a teacher for which I bring home a lot of work, and still find time for family and life. I'm not saying this to brag. I'm saying this because being responsible adult is possible. It's very possible. And as a society, I see how people seem to make more and more excuses as to why they can't do certain things. The big one seems to be manage their child.