Even (and especially) when we disagree, I have nothing but the utmost respect for you. I want to be clear on that. I have no desire to pull you into an argument, because I know you find them distasteful and oppressive.
Many people, due to the circumstances of their lives, found some of that light-hearted joking and hazing to be hurtful and impede their healing. I know it was not intended that way. However, I don't see the toxicity as having risen, but rather having been revealed. Further, at least when questioned, I've been pretty clear that I see myself as suffering from many of the same issues that I see in others. I see defensiveness as a refusal to a call to change, because who wants to change when things are perceived as good?