If You Were Coaching the Jazz....

[kabenac]

What would you tell each player to do/not do/improve on? For example, you might tell Tinsley to stop shooting and to concentrate on passing and looking for the open guy, or you might tell Marvin Williams to run the floor; and you might run some screen plays for him to see if he can use his athleticism to his advantage.

What would you tell specific players to do/not do?

 

[Stifle Tower]

Earl Watson: retire
Al Jefferson: pack your bags

Kanter/Favors/Burks: Come back in 10 years when you are all "veterans."

 

[chawx]

Al : No one will expect you to pass, sooo you should totally do that whenever you see any one come to double you. If I see one case of a double-team or triple-team that you fail to pass out of, you're *** is on the bench! Also, create contact. If you're not on the free throw line after your first two shots, you're *** will also be on the bench!

Everyone else : Push it up the floor more! Run! Run! Run! If you get tired, raise your hand, and I'll sit your ***. Also, if anyone is slacking off, looks tired, plays passively...you're on the bench!

It's not hard.

 

[kabenac]

If I could fire Corbin and hire you, I would.

 

[zman1527]

Big Al: "vacation starts early Big Guy. See ya later."

Kanter, Burks, Favors, Hayward: "Get ready for 40 minutes per game."

Hayward: "This summer develop a floater or tear drop in the lane, okay?"

 

[friendsinmyhead]

1.Pick up Jazz dancers
2. Fight David Locke
3. run naked through the ESA
4. Start fight with Harping then run away (he was a football player for Gods sake!)
5. Give MO. Big Gal, and Marvin a three week head start on their vacation (similar to AKs back in the day)
6. Submit application to coach in D league

 

[The Fresh Prince]

1.Pick up Jazz dancers
2. Fight David Locke
3. run naked through the ESA
4. Start fight with Harping then run away (he was a football player for Gods sake!)
5. Give MO. Big Gal, and Marvin a three week head start on their vacation (similar to AKs back in the day)
6. Submit application to coach in D league

It don't mean Harpring can box, but I'd probably second guess fighting a 6 foot 7 meathead too.

 

[zman1527]

1.Pick up Jazz dancers
2. Fight David Locke
3. run naked through the ESA
4. Start fight with Harping then run away (he was a football player for Gods sake!)
5. Give MO. Big Gal, and Marvin a three week head start on their vacation (similar to AKs back in the day)
6. Submit application to coach in D league

You're hired!

 

[Hitman]

What would you tell each player to do/not do/improve on?

Al: Either play hard on D, or sit.

Millsap: Hustle like you used to. Stop pouting.

Hayward: Rebound more. Learn to finish in the lane.

Foye: Learn to score inside the arc.

Favors: Develop a go-to move. Practice free throws.

Kanter: Improve passing.

Marvin: Stop turning invisible. Drive to the bucket more.

Mo: Stop with the chucking already!

Burks: Free-throw shooting.

Carroll: Good dog!

Tinsley: Sit!

Watson: Play dead!

Evans: Practice free throws.

Murphy: Work on your towel-waving.

 

[CAKAR]

It don't mean Harpring can box, but I'd probably second guess fighting a 6 foot 7 meathead too.

I would guess fighting a 6.10 300 pounds BIG-MAN like AL. Thats the reason why no coach can bench him. If you want to bench AL, you have to fight him. In Texas they say, that BIG-AL killed a bull just with his hands while playing harmonica.

 

[The Fresh Prince]

I would guess fighting a 6.10 300 pounds BIG-MAN like AL. Thats the reason why no coach can bench him. If you want to bench AL, you have to fight him. In Texas they say, that BIG-AL killed a bull just with his hands while playing harmonica.

Yeah, if you hit him he'd probably cry, throw a fit, batter you up n fry you for dinner.

 

[CAKAR]

Yeah, if you hit him he'd probably cry, throw a fit, batter you up n fry you for dinner.

I just hope you now bro, that 30 Man would not be enough to Hold back AL, if he is going to be angry. Just for provision, it would be really dangerous to say this right into his face.

 

[Chargers Jazz Angels]

Jefferson - Offer a bucket of chicken for every Free throw made in the game
Millsap - another day in training camp for his brother for every person he puts on the floor (millsap would make an excellent enforcer)
Mo - Pass the ball or play some where else next season (ie run a better offense)
Marvin - put icy hot in his jock strap so that he can get a little fire in him. tell him it stops when he starts betting his own fire
Burks - PnR baby that is his bread and butter
Hayward - Curls and more curls
Favors - Threaten him with Marvins punishment
Kanter - Giver him some of those funky jumping shoes that they had on seinfeld
Foye - Give him $100 for every lay up he gets
Carroll - See Millsap
Tinsley - Mentor, mentor mentor
Watson - just buy him a wheel chair

 

[The Fresh Prince]

I just hope you now bro, that 30 Man would not be enough to Hold back AL, if he is going to be angry. Just for provision, it would be really dangerous to say this right into his face.

What if I brought a sledgehammer to the fight and hit him where his supposedly Big Al is?

 

[The Fresh Prince]

I just hope you now bro, that 30 Man would not be enough to Hold back AL, if he is going to be angry. Just for provision, it would be really dangerous to say this right into his face.

Kevin Garnett made Al Jefferson cry by the way, Kevin Garnett still breathes.

 

[addictionary]

If I was coaching the Jazz I'd quit.

 

[Jazz Spazz]

First of all I would upgrade to a premium member here, and then I would institute every idea presented here.

This is after all where all the good coaching ideas come from.

 

[addictionary]

First of all I would upgrade to a premium member here, and then I would institute every idea presented here.

This is after all where all the good coaching ideas come from.

Noted down to rep later.

 

[kabenac]

Sounds good to me! You can be the coach, but please wear the Predator alien suit while coaching. And if we go on a losing streak, I'll sign Latrell Spreewell, because it would be cool to see him choking the Predator alien during practice (you could heal yourself).

Al: Either play hard on D, or sit.

Millsap: Hustle like you used to. Stop pouting.

Hayward: Rebound more. Learn to finish in the lane.

Foye: Learn to score inside the arc.

Favors: Develop a go-to move. Practice free throws.

Kanter: Improve passing.

Marvin: Stop turning invisible. Drive to the bucket more.

Mo: Stop with the chucking already!

Burks: Free-throw shooting.

Carroll: Good dog!

Tinsley: Sit!

Watson: Play dead!

Evans: Practice free throws.

Murphy: Work on your towel-waving.

 

[kwb]

I wouldn't say anything. I would just keep doing what I'm doing and get paid.