Ukraine is terrorist now!

[QuinSnydersHair]

I agree with everyone above.

As a soon-to-be-parent, I plan on being very strict with my own technology time. I don't want to be on my phone or laptop to the point that it detracts from my parenting or time spent with my child in any way, shape or form. I can go on when she naps or at night or at other times. Period. This is so I don't miss out on any time with her or am irresponsible in any way but also because as a parent, I should set an example. As she grows, while I think it's important for her to become tech savvy as it pertains to her education, I will not buy her a cell phone for quite a while. Quite frankly, if it were up to me, we wouldn't get one for her 'til she's 15 or 16 but I know that's a battle I'll lose to MsSerp and that we'll have to find a common ground. Once our soon-to-be-princess does get her cell though, there will be some ground rules. She won't use it at the dinner table or when we're out at restaurants just to name a couple examples. This is a huge turnoff to me when I see this at restaurants and a family's 12 year old is playing games on their PSP or cell phone. The parents meanwhile just sit like zombies, not talking to one another. It reeks of lazy parenting, a disrespect for what should be family bonding time, and an indirect signal to a child that the parents don't feel like dealing with them and that the kid can do whatever they want, so long as it's not bothering the parents.

Maybe I'm being harsh but I feel really damn strongly on this and will raise my child(ren) in such a fashion. Like anything in life, there's a time and place for certain things. Family time which comes in many forms is not one of them in this case.

 

[Stoked]

I agree with everyone above.

As a soon-to-be-parent, I plan on being very strict with my own technology time. I don't want to be on my phone or laptop to the point that it detracts from my parenting or time spent with my child in any way, shape or form. I can go on when she naps or at night or at other times. Period. This is so I don't miss out on any time with her or am irresponsible in any way but also because as a parent, I should set an example. As she grows, while I think it's important for her to become tech savvy as it pertains to her education, I will not buy her a cell phone for quite a while. Quite frankly, if it were up to me, it wouldn't get one for her 'til she's 15 or 16 but I know that's a battle I'll lose to MsSerp and that we'll have to find a common ground. Once our soon-to-be-princess does her get her cell though, there will be some ground rules. She won't use it at the dinner table or when we're out at restaurants just to name a couple examples. This is a huge turnoff to me a when I see this at restaurants and a family's 12 year old is playing games on their PSP or cell phone. The parents meanwhile just sit like zombies, not talking to one another. It reeks of lazy parenting, a disrespect for what should be family bonding time, and an indirect signal to a child that the parents don't feel like dealing with them and that the kid can do whatever they want, so long as it's not bothering the parents.

Maybe I'm being harsh but I feel really damn strongly on this and will raise my child(ren) in such a fashion. Like anything in life, there's a time and place for certain things. Family time which comes in many forms is not one of them in this case.

My oldest (11 1/2, if I don't put the 1/2 she will hunt me down) has her own cell phone now. But there are rules. It has the internet blocked and unlimited calling and text. But she cannot use it at school even though she takes it, excluding emergencies. She cannot use it after a certain hour at night (8:30 PM) and it is primarily for my wife and I, as well as her mother, to stay in contact with her. She also has to answer when we call or call us back within 15 minutes. If she fails to treat it right or follow other rules it she loses the privilege of having it.

Man did she get pissed when I got ahold of her phone and just did a nice little parental check on her texts and what pics she had taken, sent and received. Luckily it was all good but man she got bent lol.

 

[QuinSnydersHair]

My oldest (11 1/2, if I don't put the 1/2 she will hunt me down) has her own cell phone now. But there are rules. It has the internet blocked and unlimited calling and text. But she cannot use it at school even though she takes it, excluding emergencies. She cannot use it after a certain hour at night (8:30 PM) and it is primarily for my wife and I, as well as her mother, to stay in contact with her. She also has to answer when we call or call us back within 15 minutes. If she fails to treat it right or follow other rules it she loses the privilege of having it.

Man did she get pissed when I got ahold of her phone and just did a nice little parental check on her texts and what pics she had taken, sent and received. Luckily it was all good but man she got bent lol.

I like your style.

 

[Dr. Jones]

I agree with everyone above.

As a soon-to-be-parent, I plan on being very strict with my own technology time. I don't want to be on my phone or laptop to the point that it detracts from my parenting or time spent with my child in any way, shape or form. I can go on when she naps or at night or at other times. Period. This is so I don't miss out on any time with her or am irresponsible in any way but also because as a parent, I should set an example. As she grows, while I think it's important for her to become tech savvy as it pertains to her education, I will not buy her a cell phone for quite a while. Quite frankly, if it were up to me, it wouldn't get one for her 'til she's 15 or 16 but I know that's a battle I'll lose to MsSerp and that we'll have to find a common ground. Once our soon-to-be-princess does her get her cell though, there will be some ground rules. She won't use it at the dinner table or when we're out at restaurants just to name a couple examples. This is a huge turnoff to me a when I see this at restaurants and a family's 12 year old is playing games on their PSP or cell phone. The parents meanwhile just sit like zombies, not talking to one another. It reeks of lazy parenting, a disrespect for what should be family bonding time, and an indirect signal to a child that the parents don't feel like dealing with them and that the kid can do whatever they want, so long as it's not bothering the parents.

Maybe I'm being harsh but I feel really damn strongly on this and will raise my child(ren) in such a fashion. Like anything in life, there's a time and place for certain things. Family time which comes in many forms is not one of them in this case.

This is EXCELLENT. I cannot tell you how important it is. (no knocks on my post count, prease)

I agree with Stoked. Parents and kids both are aided by kids having a cell phone. Being able to call them, even track them.. but limits as to use should be carefully applied. Not too strict and not too lenient, imo.

 

[LogGrad98]

I agree with all of you about our interactions with other human beings. I actually found it a bit refreshing while in Berlin to be placed at a table with other people when I was dining alone. I struck up some interesting conversations and had some nice interatons with folks that you just wouldn't get here, also on the street and on trains, etc. But it still takes effort on our part, as it does here. We host a block party every year as a back to school thing and invite pretty much everyone in about a half mile radius, which can be a huge group. This year I am cooking about 6 pork shoulders for pulled pork on my smoker, and about a dozen racks of baby backs, with everyone else bringing pot-luck. It has been a great way to break that ice and get folks to loosen up, and it is both funny and sad to hear people talk to each other at our party who are next door neighbors for years who admit they didn't even know the other's names.

As far as the kids go, this is one reason I killed my facebook account. Now my kids have to come talk to me about what is going on in their lives, they can't just assume I read it on their FB page. This has helped spur conversation and helps me stay more connected to my kids and immediate family, in person and by phone, when the electronic umbilical is cut and I spend less time reading inane posts by high school "friends" I haven't seen in over 20 years.

 

[Dr. Jones]

I agree with all of you about our interactions with other human beings. I actually found it a bit refreshing while in Berlin to be placed at a table with other people when I was dining alone. I struck up some interesting conversations and had some nice interatons with folks that you just wouldn't get here, also on the street and on trains, etc. But it still takes effort on our part, as it does here. We host a block party every year as a back to school thing and invite pretty much everyone in about a half mile radius, which can be a huge group. This year I am cooking about 6 pork shoulders for pulled pork on my smoker, and about a dozen racks of baby backs, with everyone else bringing pot-luck. It has been a great way to break that ice and get folks to loosen up, and it is both funny and sad to hear people talk to each other at our party who are next door neighbors for years who admit they didn't even know the other's names.

As far as the kids go, this is one reason I killed my facebook account. Now my kids have to come talk to me about what is going on in their lives, they can't just assume I read it on their FB page. This has helped spur conversation and helps me stay more connected to my kids and immediate family, in person and by phone, when the electronic umbilical is cut and I spend less time reading inane posts by high school "friends" I haven't seen in over 20 years.

Good on ya bro!

Also, TRUE story.. my wife once started tearing up and was totally serious when she said to me, "How are you supposed to know what's going on in my life if you don't read what I write on facebook???"

She has since come to realize how insanely dumb that sounded/was.

 

[bigb]

My oldest turns ten next week and has half jokingly asked if she can get a cell phone. We openly tell her that's not going to happen for at least a couple years. My wife and I are in agreement on that. We also will set rules similar to Stoked's. We'll add rules saying something to the effect of "you will surrender your phone to me at any random time I ask. I will search it and if you have texted, taken pictures of, or searched for inappropriate things, you will lose the cell phone. If the number of calls and texts showing on your phone don't match with the information the cell company is showing, you will lose the phone. If you cannot find the phone when I ask for it, you will lose the phone."
I walk in the door from work and set my phone down and don't use it while the kids are around. I didn't grow up tech savy (hell, I still get hand-written checks from mom(work for my dad)) and we don't do video games. We own a wii that gets turned on maybe once a month. My kids do their chores, practice the piano and their sports, and go outside to play. We ditched pay tv a couple months ago and I love it (that opinion will probably change when football starts).

 

[Stoked]

In the trend this convo has taken there is a video out there by a Bristish guy. It is a poem about tech and how it is destroying the social aspect of our lives and all that we are, and could be, missing. It is very good and he makes some great points.

It's been all over FB. Cannot look for or link it from here. Anyone up to the task of finding and linking it?

 

[bigb]

Forgot a couple points:
My kids play pretty well with each other. We have a trampoline, swing set, and jungle gym in our backyard. They don't dare complain about being bored. They tried that one time and it resulted in an extra chore. Now they find other things to do.
But my wife and I have always been persistent in instilling a strong sense of family unity in our kids. I didn't grow up with that, and as a result I'm not on speaking terms with either of my brothers. My kids rarely see or get to play with their cousins because of that. It's usually only when my parents host something. I'll do everything in my power to prevent that from happening to my kids.

 

[Stoked]

Forgot a couple points:
My kids play pretty well with each other. We have a trampoline, swing set, and jungle gym in our backyard. They don't dare complain about being bored. They tried that one time and it resulted in an extra chore. Now they find other things to do.
But my wife and I have always been persistent in I stilling a strong sense of family unity in our kids. I didn't grow up with that, and as a result I'm not on speaking terms with either of my brothers. My kids rarely see or get to play with their cousins because of that. It's usually only when my parents host something. I'll do everything in my power to prevent that from happening to my kids.

Oh heck yes! I am a huge proponent of this. I was raised with it and preach it on a level with respecting their mother which is an absolute.

 

[bigb]

Oh heck yes! I am a huge proponent of this. I was raised with it and preach it on a level with respecting their mother which is an absolute.

We were sitting at the dinner table one day and my oldest son said something to my wife that was completely disrespectful. I knocked him to the floor at about the same time he finished the sentence and gave him a tongue lashing that lasted about ten minutes. My wife does the same thing if they try to disrespect me (without the violence).

 

[QuinSnydersHair]

I have to say, I really like the dialogue over the last page or two. It's a refreshing retreat from the debates, Jazz talk or frat party humor which makes up 99% of this site.

 

[[size/HUGE] boobs [/size]]

You really suck at this whole staying in character thing.

It appears you hang onto every word I type. White dudes in Utahr are ****ing weird.

 

[DutchJazzer]

I dont own a smartphone.
i own a mobile phone a nokia 100.

i almost never take it with me outside the home.

 

[Stoked]

It appears you hang onto every word I type. White dudes in Utahr are ****ing weird.

Don't flatter yourself. It is pretty easy to see when you are or are not maintinaing your pretend eastern european accent.

 

[Stoked]

We were sitting at the dinner table one day and my oldest son said something to my wife that was completely disrespectful. I knocked him to the floor at about the same time he finished the sentence and gave him a tongue lashing that lasted about ten minutes. My wife does the same thing if they try to disrespect me (without the violence).

Right on. My brother once swore at my mother and told her to shut up. My Dad literally backflipped over the coach and chased him down the hallway. Picked him up by his neck and slammed him against the wall.

I didn't need any other lessons lol.

 

[Dr. Jones]

Oh heck yes! I am a huge proponent of this. I was raised with it and preach it on a level with respecting their mother which is an absolute.

This. Because I have 4 boys in the house, I feel the need to be especially tough in the 'respect your mother' department.

They are not even allowed to refer to her as "her", "she", etc.. it can only be "mom."

I'm not very strict (thankfully it hasn't been required.. but there are definitely some absolutes.

 

[ema]

In the trend this convo has taken there is a video out there by a Bristish guy. It is a poem about tech and how it is destroying the social aspect of our lives and all that we are, and could be, missing. It is very good and he makes some great points.

It's been all over FB. Cannot look for or link it from here. Anyone up to the task of finding and linking it?

Is it this?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z7dLU6fk9QY

 

[Stoked]

That's it ECTYA. Thanks

 

[franklin]

I agree with everyone above.

As a soon-to-be-parent, I plan on being very strict with my own technology time. I don't want to be on my phone or laptop to the point that it detracts from my parenting or time spent with my child in any way, shape or form. I can go on when she naps or at night or at other times. Period. This is so I don't miss out on any time with her or am irresponsible in any way but also because as a parent, I should set an example. As she grows, while I think it's important for her to become tech savvy as it pertains to her education, I will not buy her a cell phone for quite a while. Quite frankly, if it were up to me, we wouldn't get one for her 'til she's 15 or 16 but I know that's a battle I'll lose to MsSerp and that we'll have to find a common ground. Once our soon-to-be-princess does get her cell though, there will be some ground rules. She won't use it at the dinner table or when we're out at restaurants just to name a couple examples. This is a huge turnoff to me when I see this at restaurants and a family's 12 year old is playing games on their PSP or cell phone. The parents meanwhile just sit like zombies, not talking to one another. It reeks of lazy parenting, a disrespect for what should be family bonding time, and an indirect signal to a child that the parents don't feel like dealing with them and that the kid can do whatever they want, so long as it's not bothering the parents.

Maybe I'm being harsh but I feel really damn strongly on this and will raise my child(ren) in such a fashion. Like anything in life, there's a time and place for certain things. Family time which comes in many forms is not one of them in this case.

Wait until you need a babysitter for sanity's sake.

-------

I thought I'd be the drill sergeant type of parent and I turned out almost the complete opposite. I don't mean that I'm against punishment or using the palm of my hand, but a lot of that stuff just doesn't do any good. Children are such good people who almost always want to do the right thing (if their parents aren't complete trash for role models that is), and mine always surprise me how they naturally pick up on wanting to "do the right thing".

As far as electronics go, my boys are on them a lot and it doesn't bug me one bit unless it's eating or bedtime. Everyone I knew growing up either played plenty of video games or they were weird. That didn't ruin the world. With the stuff available today, I can play MMORPG games with my kids and interact with them MORE than if they were playing some dumb *** video game with their friends. On top of that, it forced my oldest to learn how to read much faster than he otherwise would have because he had an incentive to do so. That in turn helps us stay in touch much more while I take breaks at work and we can talk in the chat boxes. My oldest has also learned way more than is normal for a 6 year old because of youtube. For example, I caught him watching an entire 2.5 hour WWII documentary the other day.