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Toilet Paper

Get a POOP PISTOL!
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The Thriller said:
Or you could try getting a job? Try that sometime Cy. Then you'll see what it's like to actually work. Get out of your parent's basement. Work for a company that has really cheap and thin TP
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I've taken plenty of ****s in public restrooms. I eat fairly healthy so my poop hardly requires any wiping at all. Also, the cheap stuff doesnt really bother me. I dont get the problems you are facing. Have a doctor look at that *******.
 
The Thriller said:
It's not so much the force but the frequency. Since the TP is so thin and cheap, it doesn't clean at all. So you end up having to go back 2-3 times during the day.
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Wait, so you wipe your ******* then notice an hour later that your ******* isnt clean enough so you go back to wipe more? And this happens more than once per poop sesh? How do you notice its not clean? You stick your finger down there to check? Do you just start to smell your own *** sweat and notice it smells worse than usual? So many questions.
 
King Cy said:
Wait, so you wipe your ******* then notice an hour later that your ******* isnt clean enough so you go back to wipe more? And this happens more than once per poop sesh? How do you notice its not clean? You stick your finger down there to check? Do you just start to smell your own *** sweat and notice it smells worse than usual? So many questions.
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No... Reread the first post.

Sheesh man, keep your fantasies to yourself.
 
King Cy said:
Wait, you wipe your *** so hard you bleed? It's just poopy my dude, no need to use that much elbow grease.
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It's not that I wipe hard,... I just have to wipe so many times due to the wax paper style tp just spreading the poop around.
Plus the tp sucks so much that as it folds it makes these sharp corners.
 
Metamucil, twice a day. I do this and 99% of the time it's a one-wipe affair. Often, the wipe is purely ceremonial.
 
Okay it went unnoticed but I posted the solution on the first page.

Wake up...drink coffee...poop...move on with life.

That's pretty much everything you need to know about poop. If you wake up at the same time everyday, and drink coffee (coffee is a magical poop inducing medicine if used this way), then poop, you'll be in a solid (no pun intended) routine. You will never need to poop out of cycle again.
 
Gameface said:
Okay it went unnoticed but I posted the solution on the first page.

Wake up...drink coffee...poop...move on with life.

That's pretty much everything you need to know about poop. If you wake up at the same time everyday, and drink coffee (coffee is a magical poop inducing medicine if used this way), then poop, you'll be in a solid (no pun intended) routine. You will never need to poop out of cycle again.
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Foolish. If you poop before work, you poop on your own time. I poop at work, and get paid to do it.
 
I've learned so much in this thread. I think the poop portion of my life is better and simpler than most people. I'm really glad I don't have Thriller's ***. In fact, I'm feeling like I won the *** lottery.
 
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