Dear Don, I wrote you but still ain't callin'
I left my cell, my pager, and my JazzFanz name at the bottom
I sent two letters back in autumn, you must not-a got 'em
There probably was a problem with the front office or somethin'
Sometimes I scribble addresses too sloppy when I jot 'em
But anyways, **** it, what's been up? Man how's your ankle?
I know you probably hear this everyday, but I'm your biggest fan
I got a room full of your posters and your pictures man
I don’t like that **** you’re doing with your personal trainer
I post garbage on JazzFanz because I think I’m an entertainer
Anyways, I hope you get this man, hit me back,
Just to chat, truly yours, if you don’t I will cry
This is
@oneye
That was two years ago. This is now:
Dear Mister "I'm Too Good To Call Or Write My Fans"
This will be the last package I ever send your ***
It's been six months and still no word, I don't deserve it?
I know you got my last two letters, I wrote the addresses on 'em perfect
So this is my cassette I'm sending you, I hope you hear it
I'm in the car right now, I'm doing 90 on the freeway
Hey Don, I drank a fifth of vodka
You dare me to drive?
You know the song by Phil Collins, "In the Air of the Night"
About that guy who could a saved that other guy from drowning
But didn't, then Phil saw it all, then at a a show he found him?
That's kinda how this is, you could a rescued me from drowning
Now it's too late, I'm on a thousand downers now, I'm drowsy
And all I wanted was a lousy letter or a call
I hope you know I ripped all of your pictures off the wall
I love you Slim, we coulda been together, think about it
You ruined it now, I hope you can't sleep and you dream about it
And when you dream I hope you can't sleep and you scream about it
I hope your conscience eats at you and you can't breathe without me
See Don, shut up bitch! I'm tryin' to talk!
Hey Don, that's my girlfriend screamin' in the trunk
But I didn't slit her throat, I just tied her up, see I ain't like you
'Cause if she suffocates she'll suffer more, and then she'll die too
Well, gotta go, I'm almost at the bridge now
Oh ****, I forgot, how am I supposed to send this **** out?